Well, no doubt, you will be relieved to know that the wonderful Mr Moore still has his moped and it was that particular mode of transport which he elected to utilise today. It's the turn of Bar Brookie now, to receive his attention, although he does take time out to admire the coffee machine, which he hails as a "design classic". Oh, what a star!
But more of the strange world of Mr Moore later.
Ryan espies Katie on her six yard walk from front door to work and collars her, insisting that they go to Bar Brookie (what time does that place open, I wonder?) for a coffee. Katie's not keen since she's managed to spend the weekend avoiding Ryan, but this morning, fails to come up with a satisfactory excuse quickly enough.
Of course, Ryan wants to talk about his daughter, who we find out is called Lia and lives with her mother, Abby, in one of the less salubrious areas of Edinburgh (Carlisle, being a total red herring, I guess). Ryan tells Katie how he wants to see Lia on a regular basis, although Abby isn't keen on this at all. He says that he has only seen her once (on the spurious trip to Carlisle, I suppose) and "it kills me that she [Abby] is bringing up my kid in some stinking rat-hole (that's not a very polite way to describe the capital of Scotland!) and there's nothing I can do about it". Katie, in an attempt to say something vaguely useful (she's totally bored by, and wary of, this entire development - like me) offers to try to find out more about father's rights of access to their kids.
Over at the bungalow, we discover that the long-awaited extension now has a roof and for once, Margi is keen to divert Greg's attention *from* completing this mammoth (or so it seems) project in favour of something a touch more romantic. As usual, Greg's mind is occupied with other thoughts and he spurns her advances.
Alec Mussie tried to show off his newly acquired car to Sinbad who, at the time, also had other things on his mind (not Susannah though, I hope!). The fact that Sin wasn't keen didn't register, however, so Alec then went on to suggest to Sin, that as his landlord, he ought to provide him with a garden shed which, would also benefit Sinbad by improving the property (number eight). Obviously, Alec doesn't know about Sinbad's previous experience with a shed in that particular garden, which would explain why there currently isn't one!!
Undeterred by Sinbad's refusal, Alec leaves the catalogue just in case. Mick, however, is quick to spot in it, a picture of Katrina and whilst he and Sin gawp at the scantily-clad nanny, it's Alec's turn to be disinterested: "Believe me, when you're my age, you're more interested in sheds."
Jimmy's made up to find that he still has a job at Brookie Comp next year and takes Jackie to Bar Brookie to celebrate. "Now, I'm fully licensed to poison young minds" he claimed innocently, although that's probably *not* an advisable thing to say if you happen to be anywhere near Health Inspector Extrodinaire, Mr Moore.
And yes, Mr Moore *is* still in Bar Brookie - he's having his lunch. Sitting on his own, wearing his white lab coat and devouring an all-day breakfast (with low fat spread on the toast, *of course*). He did decline to consume the egg, however, fearing that in was very slightly under-cooked. Only *very* slightly under-cooked ("on the cusp", in fact, "on the cusp"), but then one can't be *too* careful, can one?
In the chippy, Mick is discussing the food-poisoning scare and is confident that the chippy will prove to be beyond suspicion. In fact, Mick has no time for the culprits, whoever they may be - his view is that they should have the book thrown at them!
"There's no excuse, Sin. You're talking about food here and anyone who falls below proper hygiene standards deserves everything they get."
Jason calls in for lunch and Mick can't resist wrapping his cod and chips in the shed catalogue which Alec had abandoned, making sure, of course, that it is left open at the appropriate page! Seeing Katrina's picture, Jason almost chokes, or at least Mr Moore, standing a couple of yards away, thinks that he does and rushes to his aid. When he discovers the true cause, he is not amused.
"Were you involved in this little jape, Mr Sweeney? It wouldn't be the first time that your food has caused an upset [LOL, but *not* a very professional comment, Mr M!] *and* printed matter can not be used as fast food wrapping any more."
Mick objects to what he considers to be snide remarks from the Health Inspector and to prevent a show-down with Mr Moore, Sinbad is forced to admit the whole truth. This changes Mick's mood somewhat (I wonder if his earlier comments about throwing books still apply?) and Sinbad offers to do the honourable thing: "You've got every right to sack me if you want", he says.
"Too flamin' right I have" huffs Mick, but instead he sets off to try to placate Mr Moore. Having located him in the cafe bar, Mick explains the situation and believing that the matter is now closed, buys Mr M a celebratory mineral water.
Returning to the chippy, Mick tells Sinbad to keep a low profile for a few days as Mr Moore's under the impression that he's been given the bullet. Mr Moore, however, later tells Sin otherwise:
"Procedures must be followed; action must be taken".
Sounds rather like a low-flying book being launched to me - duck!!
Summary © 1999 Graeme Selway
Brookside and all related materials are © Mersey Television 1982-2001