Who knows what day it's supposed to be now, not that it really matters. Well, perhaps Ron and Anthea might not agree with that, since it's the day of the long awaited wedding, or at least it's their second attempt at getting hitched.
Greg's up bright and early, sneaking out of Susannah's after his extra-marital dalliance and fibs to Nikki that he'd spent the night boozing with a mate. He was back late, very late, he told her. Talking of Nikki, Katrina has reminded her that they'd agreed that once the trial was over that they would organise a holiday - could they end up visiting the Red Sea, perhaps?
Katrina tries to keep Nikki's mind away from wondering who the rapist might be, now that Luke has been found innocent. Katrina's not convinced that the jury reached the right conclusion: "Just 'cos he was found not guilty doesn't mean he didn't do it", she says helpfully.
Katrina isn't the only one who still believes that Luke is the perpetrator - both Mick and Jimmy believe that he did it, not to mention Greg, Jason and Margi. Mick's even considering fitting a burglar alarm in readiness for Luke's release!
Talking of Jimmy, our disillusioned teacher is still not feeling well and suspects that it's something he's eaten. Nevertheless, he has to struggle into to school for his appointment with the headmaster, Mr Howard.
Upon arrival, Jimmy finds Mr Howard, wrestling with a couple of other problems, one of which concerns the disappearance of a number of historical costumes loaned to the school and which vanished during the half-term break; the other issue being the misuse of a school computer - a web-site dedicated to druidism which includes a Brookside Close contact address, no less. "Know anything about it? fishes Mr Howard. "I haven't the foggiest" replies Jim.
Of course, the real reason for the meeting is to discuss the abysmal History results attained by Jimmy's pupils. Jimmy can't understand why the marks are so low but Mr Howard makes it plain that he will not accept poor results. "I'm sorry Jimmy, but I'm going to have to think twice before keeping you on next year." It was the news which Jimmy had been dreading.
Poor old Jimmy isn't the only person to be feeling the worse for wear - there seems to be an outbreak of food poisoning in the area although the source has yet to be identified. Ron's feeling particularly bad (on his wedding day too!), as is Rachel (although this could just be morning sickness), one of the barmaids from Bar Brookie and two of the Great Grannies. The odd thing is that Anthea seems fine. We know that she bought one of Sinbad's pies - maybe she didn't eat it?
Jacqui thinks that Ron is just suffering with pre-wedding nerves and that his claim of having food poisoning is just a typical Ron Dixon melodrama. Anyway, he makes it to the register office where Anthea is waiting.
"You look awful", she tells him, as if that would help.
"Anth, I don't feel well at all, love."
"Well, don't pass out until after the wedding, I'm not going through all that again."
Sympathetic, isn't she?
The wedding progresses, albeit hurriedly, as Ron keeps trying to get the registrar to up the ante somewhat. He can't stand still and keeps looking towards the exit. Somehow, they make it to the end of the ceremony without any mishaps and the registrar pronounces them man and wife. That's enough for Ron - he quickly gives Anthea a peck on the cheek, bids a "thanks mate" in the direction of the registrar and makes a beeline for the karsy much to the amusement of Nathan who has been sniggering all through the ceremony!
Making his way back from the bogs, Ron bumps into someone he knows. He's obviously shaken by some news, which is, as he then reveals to Anthea, that a Mrs Jones, one of his Great Grannies, died this morning of suspected food poisoning. Of course, Ron's mind by now, is working overtime as he realises that he has the same symptoms as the unfortunate Mrs Jones. He turns to Anthea:
"You'll be a widow in a week, love" he tells her.
This is all too much for Nathan who, by now, is in near-hysterics. He has to make an excuse and depart whilst he still has some control over his emotions. LOL!
So... anyone for pie and chips, then?
Summary © 1999 Graeme Selway
Brookside and all related materials are © Mersey Television 1982-2001